work is killing me. i used to enjoy going to work and now it makes me completely miserable to even think about going in. Maybe I made a huge mistake moving up to manage a house. actually im positive it was a mistake. i don’t even feel like stepping down is a good idea, im better off finding a different job and getting away from the company. shitty shitty shitty. oh and my transmission gave out this afternoon so that doesn’t help matters. ugh, and happy birthday week Benjamin.
I can’t stop thinking about you. I wish I could roll over and hold you and not let go. I know my actions say otherwise but you’re everything to me. There’s nobody on this planet that makes me feel so complete, nobody I could even imagine spending the rest of my life with. Things can only get better from here and I’m gonna fix all of this. you’ll be proud to call me yours. I love you.
Yesterday I had a meeting with John Williams to talk about the house checks I have been doing. Seeing as how it was my day off and I already put 54 hours in by wednesday night, I forgot. If I would have went to this meeting I would be the manager of Laurelton today. But I didnt, and for that I kick myself in the ass. Youre and idiot Ben. How could you let a chance like that just slip right by you?
That could have changed everything for me. Finally. I wouldnt have to live check to check. I could buy a house. Buy a car. Michelle could quit working. Everything would have been much better.
Im going to get really drunk.
I know it’s Monday but I just want to say, I had the greatest weekend. With the greatest girl. And some of the greatest friends. And alot more of the greatest girl.
These thoughts that race through my mind aren’t helping to be a happier person. I feel like a failure and that I should be farther ahead in life and doing good for myself. I’m over the party lifestyle. Honestly, all I want to do is grow up. I need help getting on track and staying there for once. Cause see, that’s where my problem lies. Staying ON track has never been my thing. ” live for the moment, live for today” “live fast, die young. ” Things I actually thought were actually good rules to live by are all now just stupid mistakes I regret and have to live with. Every time I look in the mirror I’m reminded of a regret, something that eats me up and kills me just a little more each time.
On a better note, you Michelle Riley make everything great. I don’t have a worry in the world when I get to hold you and for that, I can’t thank you enough for being the love of my life and and keeping my head up when it needs to be. I love you.
Maybe we should just let them think they’re right?
Oh, another one is the word than … seems to be misused quite often.
but I’ll let you figure that one out.
Sometimes making a 140 Character post is like an art. Finding words to replace other but still get the same meaning and passion send out. Maybe cutting wrd dwn to save space. But sometimes, 140 characters just isn’t enough. Like how I’m high right now rambling on and on and on again about stupid shit like 140 character posts.
Point is really, and simply, I love the Internet. And I’m pretty sure it loves me back.